One of the best ways to build self-esteem, confidence and a sense of responsibility in your children is to assign them regular chores around the house.

Children who grow up helping out with the everyday household tasks learn through experience how to take care of themselves as adults. They experience a higher sense of accomplishment having learned the valuable lesson of a job well done.

The ability to contribute has many rewards for both the child and the parent. When the child is given some of the tasks to do around the house, the parent is then able to spend more time doing things with them instead of hurrying from one job to another.

Clear Expectations

A dilemma parents often face is being clear and consistent in their expectations. Based on the age of the child, there may be more or less instruction needed for the task. Here are a few ways to alleviate the stress of getting kids to actually do the job:

• Keep a chart
  Use a chart or calendar to plot the chores. Depending on the age of the child, there are several different ways to keep them on track with the duties. For a younger child who is unable to read, use pictures posted on a daily calendar to show what they need to accomplish that day. Block out the day after they have completed the chore so they know what to do the next day. For an older child, a simple chart with daily chores written on it would be sufficient
• Check each day
  At the end of each day, be sure to check the charts. Using a sticker system or just check marks, make sure you recognize that the job has been completed
• Be specific
  Before you begin assigning chores, have a meeting with the kids to let them know what you expect from them and what they will receive in return. Outline in very clear detail all that is required for each job
• Keep it fun and interesting
  Have a job jar where the child can choose a chore to do. If they choose a certain job out of the jar that has a reward pictured on the back of the paper, they get that reward.

Motivation

Some parents use money as a motivator to get children to do their chores, but this is a personal choice. Each child will be unique in what works for him. The important thing to remember is that you are trying to teach them responsibility, not bribe them. Children respond well to reward systems of some kind and a great deal of praise. Don't forget to tell them what a wonderful job they are doing.

Here are some ideas of age-appropriate chores to begin:

• Ages 2 to 4 years
  Put their dirty clothes in the laundry basket, pick up toys, bring their dish to the sink after dinner, re-load toilet paper rolls
• Ages 5 to 7 years
  Straighten or make bed in the morning, vacuum the carpet, bring in the mail or the newspaper, fill the pet dish, feed the fish, dust tables, dust window ledges, pick up leaves, get backpack ready for school, tidy bedroom.
• Ages 8 and up
  Pack their lunch for school, dust, vacuum, set the table, clear the table, load dishwasher, dry dishes, fold laundry, rake, sweep floors, mop floors, take out garbage, sort laundry and all of the above!

These are just a few examples of things children can do to help out around the house. Keep in mind that the younger the child, the less detail oriented they are. Don't expect too much from them. The idea is to teach your child the value of hard work, and we want them to succeed at it, not fail. Their attitudes toward it will be reflected in how you respond to the finished work. Praise them often, but make sure they understand that to run a household, these are things that need to be done.

Giving your children well-established chore routines will promote good work habits and better attitudes about a job well done.