Whether parents like it or not, the media plays a large role in the lives of children who generally spend more time consuming media (television, video, movies, video games, print, radio, computer and the Internet) than they do any other activity, with the exception of sleeping. A large proportion of this media exposure includes acts of violence, not just in movies or computer games but also on daily news and current affairs programs where a lot of the world's major events are played out.

In today's currently volatile political climate where war is an imminent and growing threat, the 6pm news bulletin can be as daunting to watch as the latest Hollywood action blockbluster, generating feelings of fear, anxiety and uncertainty in some children and teenagers.

Tom Cerni, a psychologist at Sydney's GPS school Scots College, says censorship is not the answer. Instead, he advises parents to co-view with children, limit screen time to around 10-12 hours weekly, and empower their children to make thoughtful media choices.

"And it's a good idea to keep the television off, and turn it on when you want to watch a particular program instead of having it on continually as background noise. This shows self-discipline and remind children that the television is their servant, not their master," he says.

Cerni advises to teach children to decide which programs they would like to watch each week and inform parents of their choices, encouraging parents and children to work together. Educating older children and teenagers about the television ratings system then allows them to judge for themselves whether they should be or shouldn't be watching a certain program.

If a particular program they have watched raises concerns, a 'debrief' may follow to give children an opportunity to articulate what they understand the issue to be, and that will indicate if their thinking is healthy or if they've slipped into a 'panic mentality'.

According to Cerni, some examples of questions which can be asked during a 'debrief' include 'What were your first thoughts about the TV program you have been watching?', 'How did you feel during the TV program?' and 'How do you feel now?'.

"Asking an open-ended question allows the child to think freely about the question and an invitation to provide a full and expansive response. An open question is very different in its delivery and effect. It has the potential to give the child lots of freedom to explore relevant issues and feelings, instead the common one word answer," Cerni says.

"In asking these type of questions the parent needs to have some awareness concerning the possible steps to take should certain information be forthcoming. This is what I would call a 'defining moment' between parental support/intervention and professional support/intervention. Should the young child start disclosing unusual symptoms/feelings at the time or since, parents may want to consider getting in contact with a Counsellor, who preferably should be a Registered Psychologist and a member of the Australian Psychological Society."

During a debriefing session, it is important that parents help their children critically evaluate media violence by pointing out subtleties that young viewers may miss, such as the aggressor's motives, or intentions, and the possible unpleasant consequences that perpetrators suffer as a result of their aggressive actions.

"When adults take the step of highlighting this information while strongly disapproving of a perpetrator's conduct, the young child gains a much better understanding of media violence and is less likely to be affected by what they have seen. This is particularly true if the adult commentator/presenter also suggests how these perpetrators might have approached their problems in a more constructive and peaceful way," Cerni says.

He also advocates children be exposed to a range of different television program in order to form a balanced perspective and understand there's more to one side in every story.

"Expose them to a different range of programs such as Behind the News on the ABC which offers a more indepth look at news and current affairs," Cerni says.

"Often on the nightly news programs, the stories are very short and aim for maximum impact by using powerful images and sensationalising the event so it's crucial that children aren't getting all their information from the one source and taking things at face value. Particularly with older children and adolescents, it's a good idea to instill some knowledge of the workings of the media, and how the pressure of ratings and advertisers on commercial TV can often drive the programs we watch."

Occasionally, it's wise to have a TV-free day, when children choose alternative forms of entertainment, or charging to watch TV out of the child's own pocket money to reinforce the notion of responsible viewing.

"This makes the child assess whether they're benefiting from watching a particular program, and if they'd rather be doing something else," Cerni says.

"It's all about teaching good habits early on in life, and offering guidelines as to what is and what isn't appropriate. Like a lot of things in life, television viewing is best when done in moderation."