Eugenia well remembers her first day back at work. After 20 years spent freelancing for a number of advertising clients while she ‘raised a family on the side', the 41-year-old designer successfully applied for a full-time position with a large firm.

“I felt very nervous at the interview, but I knew I was a suitable candidate,” says the mother of two. “However, when I got the job I felt even more nervous going to work!”

Those first few months for Eugenia were a little like starting school. People were friendly enough, but she had no one to ‘hang out with' at lunch, preferring instead to wander around the city.

While she had kept her creative skills up-to-date, the sophisticated email system was bamboozling and she was experiencing a string of technical problems with her new laptop.

She found it hard to remember names or involve herself in round table meetings, as she grappled to get a handle on the scope of the new job. “I wasn't even sure what to wear,” she says. “For so many years I'd worn fairly casual clothing about the house, although I did have one suit. Now I was surrounded by younger employees wearing the latest, groovy fashion.”

Invited to join in farewell celebrations for another employee one Friday afternoon, Eugenia stood around the edges of the room picking at the nibbles for something to do.

“Occasionally someone would smile at me, but I felt extremely self-conscious. I tried to join one circle of people, but drifted away when no one said anything to me.”

The business of starting in a new business can be as daunting for someone in their early 20s, as it can be for a mid-career aged employee like Eugenia.

Maggie Chambers, 25, appeared to be a self-composed and likeable new recruit for an educational publishing company. These qualities, aside from her obvious skill, won her the position of database manager, however she also felt like a fish out of water.

“Starting a new job means you're outside your comfort zone,” she says. “It can be scary, and sometimes intimidating, and you have to soldier on through that period where it doesn't feel particularly comfortable. When you are learning your role and your place there are a lot of unknowns.

“Integrating is made easier when you have colleagues who are friendly and relaxed, and aware, and impart their knowledge freely. The process of understanding your role and understanding where you fit within an organisation takes time, so keeping patient is important. I also remind myself to recognise that for a time it won't come naturally and might feel a struggle.”

Being liked

Career consultant Rupert French, who runs Career Coaching Tasmania, says the most important aspect of being successful in a new job is to become a member of the team.

“Work on socialising,” he says. “Find out who people are and help people when you see they need help. Learn everyone's name as soon as you can. It's okay to listen to all the gossip but don't spread it around.”

French believes employers are looking for three main ingredients with prospective staff members:

• Do they have the skills to do the job?

• Are they motivated to do it well?

• Can they fit in well with the team?

“If they like you they might employ you,” he says. The ‘Likability Factor' crosses all age groups, so older employees need not feel they will be excluded based on age.

“If you are older than your line manager, you can make the line manager feel comfortable by offering to help,” says French. “They might feel uncomfortable about giving instructions, so an older employee can counter this by showing they are not a threat and want to be a member of the team.”

And while you might not want to go out partying every other night with your 20-something colleague, try to involve yourself in work socials. “The more you can find common ground with other people, the more you will be liked,” says French.

What to wear

Whether at the interview stage or after you have been employed, one of the first things people will judge you on is your clothes. Like it or not, how you present physically speaks volumes. Sometimes, the decision is made for you with a uniform, or there are industry standards, such a navy blue suit for bankers. But some companies have a more relaxed stance and there is a fine line between ‘casual' and ‘sloppy'.

Career planning professional Dawn Rosenberg McKay, author of The Everything Practice Interview Book (Adams Media 2004), says no matter what you wear, your clothes should be neat and clean. “Keep your shoes in good condition, you hair should be neatly styled and makeup should be subtle,” she says.

“If you aspire to be a manager, dress like managers in your company do. Although in theory most people love the idea of not having to wear a suit to work, they are often confused by the casual dress policies some employers have instituted over the last few years.”

Shirley Pierce, co-author (with Janet Behmer) of Dress Me Now: How to Make Your Wardrobe Behave, believes people “will be what they wear,” pointing out that clothing choice is the best predictor for success.

“Whether you wear suits or sweats, silk or polyester. Whether you're at the reception desk or assembly line. If you want to climb up the ladder, dress as if you're already standing on the top rung,” says Pierce.

This doesn't mean plunging necklines for women or even the latest, ultra expensive designer clothes. Pierce recommends a sharp, co-ordinated look, so buying a good quality suit might be a good investment. Avoid skirts that are too short, pants too tight, heels too high, shoes too worn and hair too messy.

“Even if you have to wear a fast food uniform, there are ways to look more like manager material,” says Pierce. “Make sure that your accessories are at a minimum and that whatever you wear is sharp, clean, pressed and in good repair.

“Another bonus to dressing well so you can "move up" at work is that it not only makes you look like management, you feel like management. For decades athletes have used visualisation to achieve their goals. The more you see that you look like you're in charge, you'll actually feel it. When you feel it, the closer you'll be to achieving your goal.”

Unwritten rules of the workplace

Fitting in means observing office etiquette, which again might be tricky if you don't know what that is. Here are some common ‘rules' to consider:

Emails

• Avoid sending personal emails. They can easily be forwarded and end up on a bulletin board.

• Don't make the email longer than it needs to be and use proper spelling, grammar and punctuation.

• Be polite, as if addressing the person face-to-face.

• Avoid sending large attachments.

• Don't write IN CAPITALS. IT LOOKS LIKE YOU ARE SHOUTING! Oh, and cut down on exclamation marks!!

• Read the email before you send it and don't overuse the ‘Reply All' function, or copy others in on your correspondence just to look good.

Office hours

• Get to work on time.

• If others do plenty of overtime and you are not able to, make it clear to your co-workers that you have other responsibilities to attend.
  

On the job

• Be respectful of others' work and keep your voice down, especially in shared office spaces.

• Limit your personal calls.

• Set a pleasant ring tone on your mobile phone. Anything outlandish or jarring can easily irritate others.

• Some workplaces allow employees to listen to music as they work, but if this is the case ensure you have periods where you are ‘accessible' and not in another zone with earplugs.

• Be mindful of visiting other websites during work hours. It's okay to make online payments and do some external ‘research' during your lunch-break, but you don't want a reputation for constantly surfing the net.

• Respect your colleagues' personal space. Don't clutter up shared areas and keep your desk area well organized. It speaks volumes about your work habits.

• Take a diary or notebook and pen to meetings. Put your mobile phone on silent or vibrator mode. If talking with external clients, take business cards and shake hands firmly when greeting people.

• If you have to go out, leave a note about your whereabouts, either with co-workers or at reception.

Mind your manners

• Smile and be pleasant. Say hello to others and ask about their weekend plans with sincerity. Find some common ground to talk about.

• Hold the door open for others.

• Offer to get the coffee and cakes at break times.

• Compliment a co-worker, either on a personal attribute or some work they have done.

• If you are upset about a work matter, or how you have been personally treated, wait a few days to calm down before considering your action. Avoid reacting in the heat of the moment.

Confidence

Finally, have confidence in your abilities. Presumably, you were chosen for the job because you were the best applicant. Points out Rupert French:
“Have confidence in your worth, be determined to get employers to like you and always take responsibility for results. Show that you are in control of what you do.”


And furthermore…

www.tascareers.com.au/jobwinners/index.html

www.dressmenow.com

www.parentsreturntowork.net.au

www.myfuture.edu.au

Let Go Of My Leg: How To Get The Working Life You Want After Having Children by Kirsten Lees (Hardie Grant)

Fearless Career Change: The Fast Track To Success In A New Field by Marky Stein (McGraw-Hill)